How Much Time?????

I had a discussion with someone the other day regarding how much time this person spends talking to their spouse. Although the person I was speaking to has the incredible bad luck of being 1,000 miles away from their spouse, I was shocked to find out that they spend up to 8 hours a day on weekends on the phone.

Wow.

I started wondering about this, and tried to figure out how much time I spend talking to my husband on any given day. When he is on the boat for a week, we talk maybe 30 minutes a day, and usually not in one clip. It's spread out over many short conversations, interspersed with text messages. When he is home, we talk more of course, but I can't come up with a time estimate. We spend time together because we love each other and enjoy each other's company, but I never thought about how much we actually engage in conversation. I began to think maybe we were unusual, that we were not talking enough or maybe we were just too familiar with each other and conversation was missing somehow.

I wonder though, if perhaps we are not oddballs by thinking that sometimes words are not necessary. We have a heart and spirit connection, and sometimes we can communicate with a glace or a smile that says more than a novel full of words ever could. Sometimes the silence speaks for itself. When I lay down next to my husband and rest my head on his chest, his heartbeat speaks to me in a language all it's own. It's a private language, shared by just us.

I'm not saying there is a right amount or wrong amount of time a couple should spend in conversation. I think that as relationships grow and change it varies greatly in each season. What works for some may not work for everyone. It just made me think.

So what about you? How much time would you estimate you actually spend talking to your spouse or significant other? What would you say is an average time of chatter for other couples you know?

Once Upon A Time.....

...there was a little blog. And it was a very good, sweet blog indeed. It was patient and kind, never too demanding, and always there when I needed to vent to someone.

And now, the poor thing is pouting.

My poor little blog is so neglected.

In all honesty, it has been a whirlwind of activity these past two weeks. We have had a ton of work to do on some rental property we manage, getting it ready for new renters, and in the evenings? Well, we have had something scheduled EVERY SINGLE NIGHT.

Throw in that I am still not 100% after surgery the end of Feb (I know.....it's taking a lot longer than I thought too).

My recipe for my life right now woudl read something like this:
I shall call this recipe : Life in A Blender

In a standard blender combine one hard working man who is gone 6 months of every year, one very sweet  almost 13 year old girl, and one over the hill Mom.
Toss in 3 cats.
Add one truck that needs a transmission job, two rental properties in need of repairs, one school year that is winding down s-l-o-w-l-y, 48,000,000 tons of dirty laundry, band concerts, dance practice, clarinet lessons, youth group, dance performance, Church, Facebook, at least 2 family members in crisis at this point, My mom having heart cath, my cat-nephew spending a week in ICU at his vet (poor baby!), my niece is getting married in Baton Rouge in just a few weeks[insert that aforementioned almost 13 year old is a bridesmaid here], the two hamsters we are rodent-sitting for a week, and a yard that needs mowing almost every other day due to the deluge of rain we are getting.

Blend on high speed constantly for two weeks or longer, until Mom is a train wreck.

Serve half baked, just like the Mom.

Have a good week! Stay Sane! :)

19 Kids and Counting

Do you watch this show on TLC? I started watching the Duggar family way back when it was 14 Kids and Counting. My mom told me about it, and she was fascinated with the fact that the parents had named all the kids with names that start with "J".

I have followed the show off and on since then, and now with their latest addition, a premie baby girl named Josie Brooklyn, they are up to 19 kids. Oldest son Josh is married and has a child of his own. This makes Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar parents of 19 and grandparents of one.

My bff hates this show. She says it is ridiculous for someone to have that many kids. She lists off reasons like so many kids in foster care that they could adopt, so many homeless kids, and the toll it takes on a woman's body to have one child much less 19! I have mixed emotions. Apparently, the family is self supporting, debt free and relies on no government assistance, so I have no issue with that. I also feel that a couple should have the right to decide how many kids they want to have. I like to watch them shop at thrift stores to find great deals, because I like to do that too. I love the way the family works together, and I think the children are simply beautiful!

I do wonder however, if the seriousness of the premature birth of this last child will deter them from having any more children. I wonder if they will continue to have kids that will be younger than their grandchild. I wonder how the kids will feel years from now about growing up on tv. The recent Jon and Kate mess made me wonder how much of a person's life we have a right to see.

My main concern came out of a moment of curiosity. I searched Facebook for "Duggars" in Arkansas, and came across a group called "I Hate The Duggars". Further reading brought up groups called "Sterilize the Duggars and "Anti-Duggars". Now this makes me angry.I feel that the idea of hating the Duggars or demanding sterilazation of the Duggars is uncalled for. People have the freedom to dislike choices that another person makes, but is it fair to HATE people you have never even met just because of the choices they made? That to me is not a far step from racism, which is hating people based on skin color alone, or hating people for choosing an alternative lifestyle or choose an unconventional job.

Our job as Christians is to LOVE one another. John 13:34-35 tells us that we are to love each other as God loves us. We may not like the choices others make, we may not even like the things other people do, but we have no right to HATE anyone. Sometimes it is difficult to understand why people do the thing they do, but we cannot hate anther person. It is the same with us and God. We are human, with free will and a mind to make our own choices. However, because of our inherent sin nature, we make choices and mistakes that grieve the heart of our God. What if God had hatred for us when we make mistakes? Lucky for us, He is always loving and always has a plan for us. He loves us so much that He sent His own son to die for us so that we can have eternal life through Him. (John 3:16, Romans 5:8)

I guess the best way to summarize what I think is by quoting the saying "Hate the sin, love the sinner". You may not agree with the Duggars or Jon and Kate or with me, but I hope that you do not harbor hate against anyone. It makes for a lonely and bitter life!

My prayer for the Duggars is that they are seeking the plan God has for them, and that baby Josie and all of the kids remain healthy, happy and well adjusted. Is it God's plan for me to have 19 kids????  Nope. But is it for me to judge the Duggars for having 19 kids? Not at all. And to be frank, it isn't anyone else's either.

A New Friend =)

The coolest thing about blogging and Facebook is friendship. I have reconnected with many people from my school years and early childhood, old church friends, past military families that we served with, family friends that I had lost touch with, and along the way I have met many new friends!

One of the blogs I follow is called Hippy Chick. I am not sure exactly how I found this blog, I think it may have been through "Savannah Scrapbooking" or "Want What You Have" but I am not sure.
I was immediately drawn to this blog because it is quirky, funny, warm, witty, creative, and always has something new. It is the blog I wish I had because it is updated frequently and makes me smile.

Over the past few months I learned that the blog author lives about 45 minutes from me. Imagine that! About a bazillion bloggers out there and I find one practically in my own backyard! We emailed a few times, and talked to getting together face to face, but it didn't happen.

Until Saturday. :D

My husband and I ended up in Angela's town, and I facebook messaged her. We texted just about all afternoon, and ended up meeting for dinner. Her daughter is so adorable! Unfortunately, her hubby was worn out from work and couldn't join us, but that is what next time is for!

She commented on her blog that it was like we had known each other forever, and I felt the same way. It was super cool and I can't wait to see her again!

Here is to the start of a beautiful friendship, in real life, not just online :)

Another Point of View

Remember a few months ago when I posted about the issues my daughter was having with being bullied at school? Well, tonight's youth group message really hit home with my daughter and she told me she wanted to blog about it. 


She has her own blog, and she will post this story there tomorrow, but I invited her to be my guest blogger tonight. Here is her story. Please comment and let her know what you think!

Tonight, our youth pastor was talking about friends. True friends, cocky friends, temperamental friends, etc., etc., etc. It made me think of the first half of the school year. Most of my class was kids whose parents could no longer afford private school or kids who went to the elementary school next door. Well, I was one of few kids from Pooler.

Everything was fine for a while. Breaking the ice, making friends, learning about people, and the like. I met a girl, lets call her Pop A, she was from Pennsylvania, and so I understood the left out thing. We became good friends. I hurt my knee, and they wouldn’t let me go to school because of the medicine I was taking. So, I come back to school, I think Wednesday, she wouldn’t talk to me. She wouldn’t look at me, talk to me, or even acknowledge me. Before I go on, let’s define friend. According to dictionary.com, friend, noun, means a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard. Ok, moving on.

So, I text her and we had a nice chat. Sorta how it went:
Me- Hey, what’s up?
Pop A- Nm. U?
Me- Same.
Pop A- Cool.

This is where things fell apart.
Me- Why won't u talk to me?
Pop A- Because
Me- Seriously, why.
Pop A- Well…
Me- What?
Pop A- I’m cool and you’re not.
Me- Oh

I went crying to my mom. She told to say something like, “Well, I guess we’re not friends anymore. But, I want you to know I care about you.” So I do that and she said ok. It ended up that we’re not friends, we’re classmates now.

After that, things started happening. Some examples:
-Pop B&C sitting in front of me, look towards me, whisper, and laugh
-Pop D (I only heard a snippet of this one) whispering with some others and I hear her say “like those” pointing at my shoes and laughing.
-Pop E (I had a Hannah Montana lanyard, “kids” shows are put down extremely) Hannah Montana? Laughs and gossips with others.
-All pops- our lunch table was divided. Pretty much into these groups:
*Boys (except for 3 pop boys)
* Pops
* Me and my two best friends.
-So, once my friends and I wanted to see why they were all laughing, and joking and just being happy. So we sat with them. Everyone became silent, ate, a few whispers, and just looked at us. We got the message and never sat there again.

Things like this kept happening. I cried every afternoon. I begged my mom not to make me go to school. My mom finally talked to teachers, counselors, vice principals, everyone.
We had a meeting. It was a Wednesday or Thursday, and I was called in. I could only recall two events before I broke down. They decided to move me. I expected the next day or Monday to be moved. No, they moved me in this period.

In my new homeroom, I walked in and everyone thought I was replacing a girl everyone liked. Well, that was solved. Then 3 boys thought my name was Deborah. Deborah? My name starts with an M!

Ever since then, I’ve had few problems.

A Must Read!

I have several blogs that I follow. Two of my favorites are Jamie's blog at www.savannahscrapbooking.typepad.com, and Heather's blog  at
http://blog.wantingwhatyouhave.com


Heather's blog is mostly about how to be content with your life by living simply, with detailed hilarious accounts of her daily life.

Jamie's blog is a laugh a minute, quirky and endlessly entertaining ramble of all things in her wonderful life in Dhu Land. (I secretly wanna be her when I grow up)

Last night I flipped over to Heather's blog and was shocked and sickened by what I saw. She reported that by following stat counter (www.statcounter.com), she learned that some sick, perverted, twisted person had found her blog in a Google search by searching "little kids naked".

She wrote a very real and honest account of how this made her feel and the methods she used to report this scum sucking pervert to the proper authorities. I quickly jumped onto stat counter and set up an account for myself.

I urge you to look into it for yourself, especially if you post pictures of your children on a blog or other public forum. It is a scary, ugly world we live in sometimes and we MUST protect our kids. Sadly, technology is so far ahead of legal measures that it is up to US to do what we can to stand between our family and some low life jerk who wants to get his thrill by looking at our kids in bathing suits or precious newborns in a bathtub. Makes me want to barf.

Schwan's House Party

Check this out!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I cannot tell you all how excited I am about this! My box of goodies came yesterday, full of great coupons and recipe cards and insulated lunch bags for each guest. If you would be interested in attending my Schwan's House party and sampling great Schwan's products for FREE, just leave a comment and I will get you all the details!